


The Things She Carried

by Canon_Is_Relative



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Death, Episode: s05e10 Abandon All Hope..., F/M, Gen, Grieving
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-09
Updated: 2016-03-09
Packaged: 2018-05-25 15:33:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6200833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Canon_Is_Relative/pseuds/Canon_Is_Relative
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"if we couldn't carry our dead inside us // we would be empty"</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Things She Carried

Ellen carries Bill, best man she ever knew and stubborn son of a bitch who gave her his heart and his life and the whole world — the world came along with blonde pigtails and a gap-toothed smile and a set of lungs that meant Ellen didn’t know a moment of peace for twenty-two years. 

Ellen carries John Winchester cuz hell, there’s more’n enough of the mess he left behind to go around and his boys are too young to be as slump-shouldered as they are.

Ellen carries Ash, the scruff of a boy who showed up on her doorstep all those years ago, inviting himself into her house and bringing along for good measure as much aggravation and heartache as if he was her own child.

Ellen carries Gordon, son of a bitch though he undisputedly was, despite everything he was a hell of a hunter and Ellen’s been around long enough to remember a time before hunters turned on each other.

Ellen carries Pamela, the bright-eyed psychic who’d come around with Bobby until she and Ellen were something like friends, and Ellen takes her body from Sam and Dean and thinks how hard anything like a friend is to come by in this life of theirs.

Ellen carries Joanna Beth in her final play to keep her family together. Ellen is full to bursting with the friends she’s carrying and she lets them all go in that last moment, opens herself to carry her daughter. Ellen carries Jo who’s been ravaged by hell, carries her with both their hands locked around their ticket to heaven.

**Author's Note:**

> [Commentfic originally posted here.](http://comment-fic.livejournal.com/563058.html?thread=79250290#t79250290) Prompt: Supernatural, any, "if we couldn't carry our dead inside us // we would be empty"


End file.
